Voyager Security Report Page 4
by secretcastle
Summary: Tuvok sees the prehensile plant in Janeway’s ready room as a threat. Missing scenes from “Survival Instinct.” Small hints of J/C and lots of laughing.


Summary: Tuvok sees the prehensile plant in Janeway's ready room as a threat. Missing scenes from "Survival Instinct."

Disclaimer: I don't own anything here except for Janeway's plant's sense of humor.

Voyager Security Report Page Four

_Janeway: Doesn't it look like Christmas morning in here, Commander?  
Chakotay: You have to admit, the generosity of our guests is very impressive.  
Tuvok: As is their proclivity for criminal behavior. (Presents PADD) This morning's security report.  
Janeway: (Reads) Broken ODN line, some missing personal items, damaged scanner relay. All in all not that bad.  
Tuvok: There is a second page to the report.  
Janeway: (After reading further) Well, some of these incidents are a little more serious, but on balance, I still think we did the right thing.  
Tuvok: There is a third page._

- _"Survival Instinct" Scene at Janeway's Ready Room_

Security Update on the Markonian Outpost

Report by Lt. Cmdr. Tuvok, Tactical and Security Chief, _USS Voyager_

SD: 53049.2

Page 4

RE: High security breach leading to the life threatening attack on Captain Janeway and First Officer Cmdr. Chakotay by the station manager of the Markonian outpost via a prehensile plant life of unknown origin

I had just left the ready room at 0832 after giving my morning security report to Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay when I was called back at approximately three minutes and 27 seconds later by the Captain. I was doing the regular security patrol rounds on Deck 6 at the time and I proceeded most hastily back to Deck 1. I was however delayed for two minutes and eight seconds by two members of the Kibori delegation who engaged me in trivial questions about the location of the mess hall. I believe in hindsight that such line of questioning was a deliberate attempt to defer my attempt to immediately aid the Captain and the Commander.

I reached the door of the ready room and rang the chime twice with no answer. I was about to chime a third time when the comm link opened and the Captain belayed her earlier order for my assistance. I immediately noted the unusual strangled tone of her voice. I inquired if anything was amiss but her only answer was a high pitched shriek so unusual of the Captain. It was followed by another frenzied voice in the background I could tell was Commander Chakotay's.

I immediately entered my security override to unlock the door. I entered to find a most alarming scene.

Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay were entangled in the vines of a plant measuring 2.41 by 1.2 meters that I recognized as a gift from the Markonian outpost station manager. The alien life form had already grasped them by the hair, arms and legs and apparently torn off their uniforms. But what was most disturbing was the plant appeared to have caused them fits of maniacal hysteria.

I immediately used my phaser set to stun at the plant's roots. It quickly released the Captain and the Commander but they remained in their hysterical state for approximately a minute and six seconds on the ready room floor before they managed to hyperventilate into a state of composure. I ordered a level 10 force field around the life form and called assistance from sick bay. However, both the Captain and the Commander in their rather disheveled state belayed the order, dismissed the assault as a non-security issue and refused to authorize any further investigation.

I believe that the alien life form possibly affected the Captain and the Commander's judgment. It is my recommendation as Chief of Security that they be thoroughly assessed by the Chief Medical Officer. I also recommend that upon completion of such examination that a full investigation be mounted on this attack so that the perpetrators may be brought to justice.

***

The Emergency Medical Hologram put down his tricorder and faced his exasperated Captain. On the next biobed sat the first officer with a similar annoyed look on his face.

"Well?" Janeway didn't need to explain.

"I don't see anything wrong with them," the Doctor reported. "Except for higher levels of endorphins which I suppose is normal considering how much they were laughing as you reported."

Janeway turned to the stoic-faced Vulcan who stood in rapt attention the whole time. "We told you Tuvok. It was a tickling plant. There was no need to isolate it on the brig and certainly no need to mount a full investigation against those who sent it to me."

"The alien life form may have caused damage had I not intervened," Tuvok said most seriously. "I believe it is prudent to take precaution."

Janeway arranged her face into outmost seriousness though inside she was fighting a battle not to roll her eyes. _Only Tuvok would consider a plant that tickles as life threatening,_ she thought. _It figures considering Vulcans lacked a sense of humor. _She reminded herself that Tuvok was her oldest friend and meant well even if he showed it in a most paranoid way.

She was about to settle the matter when Chakotay saved her the trouble by speaking first. "Well there was no harm done Tuvok. I'm sure there's no cause for concern, but if it appeases you, I'll ask some of our new friends from the Kibori delegation about the nature of the plant. I don't want to offend anyone by doing an interrogation. Meanwhile, we can transfer the plant in a corner of the airponics bay and I'll post a warning to the crew to leave it alone."

"Thank you, Commander," Tuvok replied curtly. Janeway could tell he was at least satisfied for the moment.

"Well then I see no reason to keep the whole Command team in my sick bay. You're free to go. I have new patients to attend to," the Doctor dismissed them as a group of Kibori tourists walked in. The Doctor was up to his photonic ears treating minor cases and answering medical queries from their guests. But Janeway knew despite being kept busy, the Doctor was rather flattered to have so many new faces coming to see him and to take interest in what he did.

She got off the biobed and motioned her two officers to follow her out. They entered the turbolift together in utmost silence. Suddenly being in a confined space with these two men made her feel very uncomfortable especially since she recalled the rather embarrassing incident in her ready room…

"_It's got me by the hair," Janeway called to her first officer desperately._

_Chakotay grinned but came over to help her. He gently pulled away the vine and leaves. She felt his fingers brush against the skin of her forehead to clear up a stem there. His smile seemed to arrest her and she was momentarily lost in his gaze._

"_Chakotay," she whispered as she felt a tingle up her spine. _

"_Kathryn?" he whispered back. _

_She felt the vine pushing her towards him and she made no move to fight it. His face was inches from hers and if she moved any closer… _

_She woke from the spell when she caught sight of another vine snaking up his neck, and heading towards his ear._

"_Watch it! It's going to grab you too!" she cried out. He pulled back from her and wrenched away the stem. She was suddenly grateful for the interference of the plant before she did something she would regret. _

"_A little help?" Chakotay asked as the stem proved a bit more difficult to remove from his shoulder. _

_She happily obliged by gently tugging at the leafy stem. As she removed it, another tingle shot at her spine. It tickled and she involuntarily giggled. To her surprise Chakotay giggled back at her. _

"_Did you just chuckle Commander?" she teased._

_He didn't respond, instead he broke into an open laugh. It was a very hearty laugh and she felt pleasurable warmth go through her at the sound. It was nice to hear him so candid and carefree. She felt a second tingle going down her spine and she welcomed it. _

_But then suddenly the tingle changed course on her back as no natural quiver ever did. It made its way up her stomach. She gasped and suddenly realized those weren't her nerves. _

_Something was creeping inside her jacket!_

"_Kathryn, it's the plant!" Chakotay shouted before he buckled involuntarily and burst into series of wheezing guffaws. _

_Instinct took over her and she tapped her combadge. "Janeway to Tuvok, ready room—"She didn't have time for anything more for suddenly she felt the vine creep up to her side and it found her tickle spot just below her navel. She let out a howl of laughter. _

"_Chakotay have to… haha… get rid… haha…"_

_He was way ahead of her. He tore off his uniform jacket in an effort to rid himself of the invading vine. Janeway followed suit and took off her own uniform jacket. But it wasn't enough. The plant somehow managed to crawl inside her Starfleet issue undershirt. She tore at it viciously and scattered her pips on the floor in the process. She was down to her tank top where she finally grabbed hold of the plant's stem and pulled it away from her back and shoulders. She wrenched another vine that covered her stomach. _

_It gave her relief from the tickling enough to breathe and glance at Chakotay. She was rather surprised that he was already bare-chested but he was still squirming against another creeping vine trying to reattach itself at his head while another was stealthily moving inside the waistband of his pants._

_She was considering informing him about the latter threat when the door chimed._

"_Tuvok!" they said in unison. Janeway knew from the panicked look in his eyes he was thinking the same thing as she. Their state of undress was likely to raise more than one eyebrow from the Vulcan. _

_Janeway frantically searched for her combadge on her discarded jacket just as a second chime rang. From the sound of Chakotay's renewed series of chortles, she knew the plant got him again. She found her combadge and tapped it just as she felt the plant creep up her right pant leg._

"_Tuvok… belay that order…" she managed to squeak at her combadge before the vine found her other tickle spot at the back of her knee. She could no longer control her composure. She let herself howl with laughter as the plant re-conquered the ticklish areas on her torso and found new sensitive spots on her ears._

_She felt the tingle lift and she collapsed on the floor, squirming as the ticklish sensation remained even when she could not longer feel the touch of the aggressive plant's vines. When she finally calmed down she looked up to see Tuvok standing before her with phaser in hand. He ordered a level 10 force field around the plant. _

_Suddenly she realized how she must look and felt a blush up her cheeks. She glanced at Chakotay and wished she hadn't. Her usually dignified first officer wasn't just completely bare-chested, his pants had already fallen and pooled down at his knees. His boxers—she found out he used boxers—had been pulled a little too low. A half inch more would reveal something forbidden by common decency to be flaunted. He still appeared to be uttering a few weak giggles. But when he met Tuvok's eyes, he abruptly stopped and attempted to compose himself._

"_Tuvok to Sick—"_

"_Computer, belay that order!" Janeway jumped immediately before Tuvok could complete it. Chakotay uttered something similar to that effect and she knew their thoughts were in sync again. The Doctor was too busy to come to them in the ready room so most likely Tom Paris will show up as medic. Tuvok seeing them like this was bad enough. They would never live it down if Paris walked into that door._

"_It's alright Tuvok, we're fine," she assured him as she made a grab for the nearest undershirt and pulled it over her head. It slipped on her rather easily and she focused on Tuvok again. She tried to avoid looking at Chakotay but she couldn't help but see him struggling with his pants in her peripheral vision._

"_Captain, I believe medical assistance is in order. I shall carry out the investigation."_

"_No," Janeway told him firmly as she reached for her uniform jacket. "The Commander and I are fine. Just a bit knocked over," she explained as she attempted to put on her jacket. She was puzzled as to why it wouldn't fit as snuggly as it used to._

"_But Captain such an attack—"Tuvok argued._

"_It wasn't an attack Tuvok. I think it was just a tickling plant. It's harmless," Janeway cut in as she pulled up her jacket on the other arm with some difficulty._

"_But Captain, I must insist—"_

"_It's not a security issue, Tuvok. It's a harmless plant, nothing more," she said irritably. She tremblingly pulled on her jacket and it enclosed on her body rather awkwardly. She tugged at it harder to no avail and her temper grew. "That will be all, Lieutenant. Dismissed."_

_She didn't see Tuvok's expression for she was distracted from a grunt from Chakotay. She turned to find her broad shouldered still bare-chested commander struggling without success to put his arms on the proper holes of his undershirt. _

_Tuvok turned to Janeway with a raised eyebrow. "I believe that the Commander will have better luck getting dressed if you returned his shirt, Captain," he said in his usual even voice before he turned on his heel and marched out the door._

_Janeway watched Tuvok's exit for a long confused moment. She glanced back at Chakotay and then down at her own chest. She buried her face in her hands in embarrassment. _

_She heard a chuckle from Chakotay and finally chanced a look at him. He ridiculously had her shirt still stuck around his neck. "I believe this is yours," he said with a grin as he extracted the small gray shirt from his body._

"_Hand it over," she grumbled at him in her usual authoritative tone._

_He dangled it just out of her reach. "Just as soon as you take off mine," he teased._

_She felt her cheeks grow warm at the remark, but felt somewhat emboldened at the same time. She took off her jacket again then slowly tugged off his shirt. She was suddenly conscious when she was reduced back to her tank top so she tossed his shirt back to him to distract his gaze. He handed hers and she turned around to put it on. She took her time putting her jacket on and then spent even more time pretending to search for her fallen pips. She found them almost immediately but she delayed picking them up just to give herself time to calm her pounding heart._

_When she finally did turn to him he was fully dressed and back to his old self. _

"_Well… that was certainly…" she began awkwardly._

"_Yes that was…" he began as well. _

_They looked at each other then both of them began laughing once more. _

"_I haven't laughed like that in years," Janeway quipped._

"_Neither have I," Chakotay replied. "I think we've found another useful gift from our new friends. It certainly helped boosted my spirits. Do you really think it would have hurt us?"_

_Janeway stared at the plant now encased in maximum force field. The plant's vines hung limp and several of its leaves had fallen off and scattered around it. It looked rather forlorn in that bald, weak state. If it could make a sound, Janeway could almost imagine it would whimper like a hurt puppy. _

"_I'm sure it was harmless," Janeway told him. "A level 10 force field for a plant that was already phasered? Tuvok must have overestimated the danger. Computer, remove force field."_

"_Acknowledged."_

_The force field flickered away but two seconds later the plant suddenly dematerialized in front of their eyes. _

_Chakotay reacted first. "Computer, who ordered a site to site transport of the plant in this room?"_

"_Lt. Commander Tuvok," came the pleasant voice of Voyager's computer._

"_Where is it now?" Janeway asked._

"_The plant was beamed directly to the brig."_

"_The brig?" Janeway asked. "It's a plant not a person," Janeway exclaimed. "I didn't authorize Tuvok to make a transport. Did he just disobey my orders?"_

_As if in answer, their combadges chirped and the Doctor's calm voice came through._

"_Captain Janeway and Commander Chakotay, please report to sickbay," _

_They stared at each other before Chakotay answered. "Is there a problem Doctor?"_

"_I'd like to find out when you get here, Commander," the EMH replied in his usual condescending tone._

"_What is this about Doctor?"Janeway asked. _

"_I'm not really authorized to answer that over the comm. Please proceed immediately to sickbay."_

"_Not authorized by whom?" Janeway asked in a now exasperated tone._

"_Again, I'm not at liberty to say. Please come on your own immediately or I will have security escort you here," the Doctor replied firmly._

"_Well, that answers the question," Chakotay told her. _

"_Fine Doctor, we're coming there. Janeway out." She turned back to her first officer and led him out of the room. "Oh yes, Tuvok is definitely overreacting to this."_

The turbo lift doors flew open on Deck 1 and Janeway felt relieved for the interruption of her memories.

Tuvok stepped away wordlessly back on the bridge. When he disappeared she shared a furtive look with Chakotay. He too looked glad for normalcy. They turned to their usual stations but Janeway decided she'll revive this topic with her first officer later at their usual dinner. Now that she safely regained her decorum she realized how funny the experience was.

She barely began her usual checks on her station when Tuvok called their attention of a power failure in the security grid, indicating a breach.

Janeway jumped at this. Now this was one security problem worth investigating and she quickly put the previous incident out of her head.

***

Neelix somberly entered the airponics bay to collect fruits and vegetables for tomorrow's breakfast. Their newest crewmember Marika mentioned over dinner how much she liked omelets. Neelix wanted to surprise her tomorrow with his Talaxian tomato egg special.

He gave a deep sigh at the thought of her. She had only one month to live, maybe even less. There was nothing anyone can do about it but make sure she lived life to the fullest. As morale officer it was his duty to make sure she did just that while he encouraged others to help her. But even he had trouble getting her to open up to him, much less the rest of the crew. Marika didn't seem to want anyone getting too close to her. Neelix understood she didn't want anyone hurting when she inevitably died.

Neelix couldn't help but feel depressed at the situation. There were just times when even the morale officer needed a boost of morale too.

He picked his tomatoes in silence but paused as he noticed a large plant at a corner of the room. He heard about this plant from the Doctor earlier. It was a gift to the Captain by one of their new friends at the station. The Doctor told him it was some sort of harmless tickling plant but Tuvok thought it was attacking the captain and the commander and raised an alarm. Neelix had to agree with the Doctor's opinion that Tuvok probably overreacted.

Neelix approached the plant. It looked harmless enough and the worst that it could do was tickle him. And he could use a tickle right now to lift his spirits.

"I heard you caused quite a stir," he told the plant as if he was talking to an old friend. Kes told him it was good for plants to talk to them and he gained the habit even after she left. "You gave my Vulcan friend quite a fright this morning—not that he ever gets frightened of course..."

Suddenly the airponic bay doors opened and in walked Tuvok. He was out of uniform, indicating that he was off duty. He carried one of his prized orchids with him and nothing else.

"Mr. Neelix, I advise you to step away from that plant immediately," Tuvok's voice was calm as ever but Neelix knew he was alarmed. "Did you not hear the ship-wide warning Commander Chakotay made this morning?"

"Oh relax, Mr. Tuvok. It's just a harmless plant." He patted the leaves to demonstrate and the plant moved to wind a tiny stem towards his neck. Neelix felt a tickle behind his ear and giggled. "See it's just friendly."

Tuvok put his orchid down and ran towards him. He attempted to pull the plant away from Neelix's neck but several of its vines already entangled the Talaxian's hair.

"Oh dear, it's got me by the hair," Neelix said between giggles. "Mr. Tuvok, could you help..."

Tuvok quickly wrenched the vines from Neelix as effectively as he can without scalping the hairy Talaxian. But those few precious seconds were all the plant needed to distract the Vulcan enough to entangle him as well.

Neelix did not see the need for alarm though. He found the situation already funny in itself and somehow the plant's tingly touch on his skin had him laughing out loud.

"Oh Mr. Tuvok... ha ha... this is fun... haha... If the crew ever need a... heehee... morale boost... we can just send them here... haha... or better yet... hee hee hee... maybe we can reproduce this..."

Tuvok didn't reply for he seemed busy struggling against his bonds.

Neelix could feel the plant entering through his shirt and through the holes of his pant legs. He squirmed, scratched and attempted to unbutton his jacket to clear pull it away. But the plant was faster. It found all his right tickle spots and he laughed even harder until tears came into his eyes. Through his bleary vision, he noticed Tuvok's normally tight lips began to thin.

"Mr. Tuvok..." Neelix managed to gasp between fits of laughter.

Neelix saw Tuvok's eyes widen as he had never seen them before. For a split second he was alarmed but then suddenly Tuvok's mouth flew open and he let out what an unmistakable laugh. It was loud, long and uninhibited. It was so full of mirth that Neelix couldn't help but feel pleased.

For a long time they laughed and laughed mindlessly until Neelix's stomach ached. He did not even notice when the plant let him go. Tuvok's wheezing laughter was just too infectious and he continued laughing on his own accord even though he no longer felt the tickling sensation of the plant.

"Oh Mr. Tuvok, how delightful. Finally something has made you laugh," Neelix exclaimed when he finally got a hold of himself and straightened out his half unbuttoned jacket. "And they say Vulcans had no sense of humor."

Tuvok couldn't reply for he continued laughing uncontrollably that tears streamed down his cheeks. Neelix however, noticed something else. He could see panic in Tuvok's eyes. He immediately knew something was wrong.

"Neelix to security!" he called on his combadge.

***

Janeway gave out an unabashed laugh at the comment made by her first officer regarding Tuvok's fourth page security report this morning.

Chakotay grinned back at her from across the candle-lit table then moved to sit next to her on the couch, while cradling his fourth glass of cider. He seemed to appreciate the bubbly drink as much as she did. "Well this is one day of laughs for us at least," he said.

Janeway calmed herself down and drank a mouthful of her own fourth—or was it her fifth glass of cider? She lost count. All she knew was that the bottle was almost gone. It was just too good. Fortunately, she had an entire crate of it. It was one of the gifts she received from their new friends in this outpost that she truly appreciated. She was willing to share it only with her First Officer.

"Well we could all use some humor after this sad incident with Seven and the former drones," she said. "Tuvok's report certainly does the trick. I know it's bad of me, but I saved and bookmarked it on my personal PADD so I can read it whenever I need a pick-me-up."

Chakotay chuckled. "Don't let Tuvok hear you say that. He won't like it if he finds out you're not taking him seriously."

"I know, but frankly I was more embarrassed at him finding us in the state we're in than worried we were in any real danger."

"I don't think we were," Chakotay replied. "I asked one of the Kibori and he said the plant does induce laughter. They called it the 'Sinister Snigger.' At least that's how the universal translator interpreted it. It sounded like a name of a tickling plant to me."

"Sinister Snigger?" Janeway asked. "Funny how the universal translator came up with such an alliterative name. But I think 'Sinister Snagger' would have been more appropriate. That thing had quite a grip."

"And a talent for getting people to strip."

Janeway blushed slightly. But Chakotay only gave a hearty chuckle. He grabbed the bottle and tipped the last contents into his bottle. Janeway almost glared at him for not saving enough for her. But she did remember she could always grab another bottle.

"Well Tuvok had a point," Chakotay said. "I did rather feel violated being forced to strip by that plant. I suppose Vulcans might have a different definition of danger. He probably thinks he's protecting us from losing our dignity."

Janeway tittered back. "I'm not exactly sure if he was trying to protect our dignity at all or exposing our lack of it by involving the Doctor."

Chakotay grinned and leaned closer to her. "Oh yes I bet Tuvok was having a good laugh at us from inside that repressed shell of his when the Doctor was questioning us in sick bay about our state of undress."

"Vulcan's don't laugh," Janeway corrected matter-of-factly. "They don't even have a sense of humor."

Her combadge suddenly beeped and Neelix's voice chimed in. "Sickbay to the Captain?"

"Yes, Neelix?" she asked.

"I think you better come down here. It's about Mr. Tuvok."

"What's wrong Neelix?" she asked seriously.

"He was just attacked by that plant someone gave you."

Janeway's eyes went wide and she met Chakotay's equally alarmed gaze. They both got up and headed towards the door. The comm link remained open.

"What happened to him?" Chakotay asked as they ran down the corridor together towards the turbolift.

"Well…" Neelix hesitated as if unsure how to describe it. "We can't get him to stop laughing."

"We're on our way Neelix, Janeway and Chakotay out," Chakotay said before turning to his captain.

"Well I…"she began as the turbo lift doors closed. "I think stand corrected. Deck 5."

***

"So it really was a life threatening plant?" Janeway asked seriously as she glanced from the Doctor's station to Tuvok who lay on a biobed a few feet away.

"I suppose that depends on what species you are talking about," the Doctor replied.

He called up an image of the plant on his console. The graph showed the plant's vines like tentacles.

"The plant has the ability to feel at the skin's nerve endings. It seeks particular sensitive spots that induce tickling sensations. At the same time it leaves tiny hair residues on the skin." The image magnified to show tiny hairs that were embedded on stems.

"These little hairs continue to give the same tickling sensation on the skin even after the stems have detached from the skin. In the case of Mr. Neelix, his skin composition repels these little hairs so the plant left him alone almost immediately. With humans, the hairs attach itself to the skin but their effect wears off in a matter of minutes. Vulcan skin however is vulnerable as the hairs are absorbed into the skin itself and they release a chemical toxin so powerful it can overcome a Vulcan's control over physical sensations. He would continue laughing until his lungs and muscles could no longer take it. Literally, Mr. Tuvok would be tickled to death."

"Tickled to death?" Janeway gasped in horror. "Tuvok would have been killed?"

"If Mr. Neelix hadn't called and I didn't find a way to extract the hairs from his skin before it was absorbed into his epidermis completely, he would have been."

Janeway could find nothing to say. Guilt washed over her for not taking the situation seriously enough. She met Chakotay's gaze and he looked just as miserable as she was feeling.

"Will he be alright now Doctor?" Neelix asked with utmost seriousness.

"He will be after his overtaxed muscles gets some rest with a few hours of sleep," the Doctor replied.

"Is there anything else we could do?" Chakotay asked. His remorse was evident in his voice.

The Doctor raised an eyebrow. "Nothing. Just remember never attempt to tickle Tuvok."

"Yes, Sir," Janeway, Chakotay and Neelix replied most seriously. Although a human adage says laughter may be the best medicine, they realized it didn't exactly apply for Vulcans.

***

Security Update on the Markonian Outpost, _Supplemental_

Report by Lt. Cmdr. Tuvok, Tactical and Security Chief, _USS Voyager_

SD: 53050.3

Page 5

RE: High security breach leading to the life threatening attack on Captain Janeway, First Officer Cmdr. Chakotay, Mr. Neelix and myself by the station manager of the Markonian outpost via a prehensile plant life of unknown origin dubbed as the "Sinister Snicker."

The Chief Medical Officer's analysis proved that the plant given to Captain Janeway is a hostile creature fatal to Vulcans and possibly to humans if they are exposed to it for increased lengths of time. The plant has been neutralized as per my recommendation after the EMH made a thorough analysis of its cellular structure and made a log of its unique yet dangerous properties for future reference.

Due to my incapacitation, full investigation of the matter surrounding its origin began long after Voyager left orbit of the outpost. Thus, I was unable to succeed in uncovering the full motives of the Markonian station manager for such an attack. I can only conclude that incapacitating the chief security officer long enough to stop a full investigation is motive for other possible attacks.

I shall therefore continue on a detailed investigation of all the gifts that Captain Janeway and the rest of the crew received from the Markonian outpost.

***

"All the gifts?!" Chakotay gasped as he read the last statement of Tuvok's report that Janeway just handed him. "You mean he's confiscating them for testing?"

"Well I don't mind if he takes away all of these," Janeway said pointing to the mess of items in her ready room. "But I was thinking does that include—"

"The cider!" Chakotay finished for her. "Do you still have it?"

Janeway motioned for him to follow and she ducked behind her desk. Chakotay saw the crate was under the table.

"I suppose we have to give that up too," Chakotay said rather disappointedly.

But Janeway gave him a determined look. "Of course not," she said. "Computer initiate site to site transport of the crate under my desk, Janeway omega four zero three five."

"Acknowledged."

The crate disappeared in a shimmer of light.

"Where did you send it?" Chakotay asked.

"A secret hiding place Tuvok won't find," Janeway said with a catlike smile. "At least until after this investigation is over."

Chakotay couldn't believe her nerve. "But do you think that's wise? After all a plant we thought harmless turned out to be deadly."

"Fine," Janeway said lightly. "Computer, erect a level 10 force field around the crate. There, even Tuvok will consider it secure."

Chakotay laughed. "Oh yes, secure from Tuvok. Kathryn, you're brilliant."

"That's why I'm the captain," she grinned. "But seriously, don't worry about it. I ran a scan on the cider after we got back from sickbay. It's just a plain alcoholic drink. The worst thing it can do to us is get us drunk."

"Getting the Captain and the Commander drunk together?" Chakotay said in a tone of mock surprise before he gave her his own charming grin. "Oh I think I agree with Tuvok with that one. That _can_ lead to a serious security threat."


End file.
